With Phoenix temperatures dropping into the 30s for lows and 50s for highs the past few days, Valley residents are digging out their jackets. And within the pockets of those jackets many are finding reminders and memories of the last time they were worn.

Just last night, I was running to the grocery and put on one of my light jackets for the first time this winter season. Inside was a reciept.

Today at work numerous co-workers had found the same. The mother lode was found by Chrystyna, who had all kinds of stuff from her trip last year to California discovered in her coat pockets.

She acted like a kid at Christmas as she pulled FIVE receipts from the pockets of the coat she last wore on a trip to Universal Studios. Those included her movie ticket to Black Swan ($7); Universal Studios ($74);  Starbucks ($6.30); and the Pub ($19.73).  We laughed as she recouted the memories and our friend Tony likened it to finding a time capsule.

Jamie found this St. Michael pendant in a parking lot years ago. She was about to move from South Carolina to Arizona and her c0-workers were having a going away lunch for her. One of her co-workers told her to keep it as it would protect her in her travels.  She said she put it in her coat pocket that afternoon and left it there. She found it again just the other day as she does each year, and it reminds her of that special afternoon with friends.

Finding things in your pockets, even something as simple as a receipt, invokes a memory. Usually a fond one. A simple pleasure. It’s good.

When you pulled your jacket out for the first time this fall or winter, did you find something in your pocket?

I have what many might find weird about how I feel about celebrating one’s birthday. I kind of don’t. And I even find those that make such a BIG deal about theirs to be … not sure the best word here. It is not a bad thing if you enjoy your day or week or in some cases, MONTH. I find I do those things every other day.

I am in the camp that feels it may be too pretentious to call such attention to oneself. Like the person who announces it’s their BIRTHDAY to all who will listen. (I hope this doesn’t offend as this is NOT my intention.) Maybe I need to loosen up! I have made plans in the past to have a party, but for various reasons, did not.

Yet, it is not a day I do not acknowledge or find un-important. It is. And I do think about it as it approaches and all day of the day itself. I’ve just changed in what or how I choose to celebrate it.

Fun versus Meaning

The common question asked is always what did you do? I ask the same one myself of others. Did you have fun? And my answer is always about the same. I ususally don’t do anything; if it happens to fall on a Friday or Saturday, I go out but no one is told it’s my birthday.

I braced for the day at work. It is a place that is notorious for doing SOMETHING to your cube ….

I work with some very creative, talented people … with way too much time on their hands.

My Celebration

There is only one thing I really want on this day, every year. It’s been the same thing for over 20 years now. And it has made for the best birthday every time.

That thing is a call from my daughter and son. I look forward to this every year.

Birthdays to me have become events that mark each year for us. More so than holidays or even the start of a new year. I feel the day of my birth is more significant as a benchmark in life than any others. They naturally cause us to reflect and realize time is short … or getting shorter.

It’s gotten kind of humorous as I tease my kids as to which one calls me first. Texts don’t count. And voice messages don’t count either. My daughter (being the oldest) once called just after midnight once and tried to claim she was the first. The rule also allows that as long as they get that call in before midnight, it’s good.

For me, my focus is less on doing something celebratory and more on doing or receiving something meaningful. And in that regard it is important this be authentic. I appreciate everyone who sent out a Happy Birthday. I really appreciate the dinner from my friend Kathy and all those little things some of you did to remember this day! But my day of birth isn’t measured by how many happy birthday wishes are on a Facebook wall (and this year I removed it so no one got a heads-up to post a note on the wall.) Or cards and gifts.

It has become a day, above all others, to make a call to the person(s) that are the closest to you. Or to receive that call.

So when anyone asks if I had a good birthday … yes, it was great. What did I do? I got two calls. This year, the first from my son, and the second from my daughter — before midnight.

And there are a lot of awards being awarded. Here’s a list of some of the prestigious honors:

• Blue Ribbon School of Excellence Award
• Carnegie Mellon Awards of Excellence
• Magnet School of Excellence Award
• President’s Education Award Program
• National School of Excellence Award
• A+ Schools for Excellence

… and many more. These are all good. It’s great to honor teachers, students, and administrators for going above and beyond.

Here’s the deal … all too often these awards are honoring a level of excellence that was already there. The accomplishments are somewhat pre-determined. When you have the highest performing kids in an area, it follows pretty close that excellence awards are found there too. Nothing wrong with that. It was my experience, while teaching at a recognized, award winning, national middle school of excellence, this was the case.

I would like to see another type of excellence award. And this one would award the often forgotten student, teacher, or administrator. I should not use the word forgotten as these schools are noted publically every year for under performing. Teachers’ classroom grade level results are published and administrators’ schools are humiliated in the press, being labeled as failures.

Nothing could be farther from the truth. Why? Because in every one of these schools, in every year, there are kids that are being motivated to stay with it, given hope that it will be worth it, and cared for by teachers and administrators giving heroic efforts of time, energy, and money.

Standards are great and worthy to strive for. It’s just that the playing fields are far from level in education. Worse, labeling as failures those with the deck stacked against them by requiring placement of round objects in square holes to succeed is just wrong.

I have been in both scenarios. Excellence awards in the first are primarily judged by the aggregate of an exam score. Excellence in the other are results of qualitative measures.

The kid who had no desire to finish school, graduates; who couldn’t read, begin to read; who constantly disrupted the classroom, behave appropriately, a trouble-maker turned peace-maker; who had no goals, begin to plan for the future; who had no hope, see a better tomorrow.

Evidence those kids when they start turning in assignments because teachers who care tell them what they like about it versus what is wrong. Watch the joy and excitement in the classroom when they begin to engage. Or the smiles exhibited on the faces of the families during the graduation from these “failures.” That’s excellent.

If we can keep kids in the game, give them hope, and instill a desire to be a LIFE-long learner, they can succeed. They will continue to advance, far past graduation.

Imagine the signs that could be posted outside those buildings. Imagine the kids that could become … something better.

I have seen enough of the product or service disclaimers we, as bloggers, seem to feel the need to disclose if we write a recommendation and include an affiliate link. It goes something like this, “I’ve just found the best online service with Awesome Service A. Let me tell you about it! (Please note the following is an affiliate link. If you prefer, here is the direct link … blah, blah, blah.)

Don’t misunderstand, I am not referencing those industries required by law that you disclaim, such as real estate.

You see, if I am reading your blog, following your tweets on Twitter, listening to your conversations, I am doing so because you have my respect. Your reputation or word is valued. Give me a recommendation, and I am not offended that you might receive something in return for that. In business, it is often seen as gratitude. That might be a gift card, tickets to a movie, or cash.

I’ve known of those that paid referral fees. In the restaurant business, an owner commonly comps meals or drinks in gratitude of business sent their way.

Here’s the point. In relationships where your word is your bond, there is integrity. In my world, if I recommend something, I have actually used it myself and liked it. That is why it has my word behind it. I will not nor have not recommended things for the sole purpose of receiving a cash fee. That has always been against my ethics. So when place a link to a book, a vitamin company, an online host, or a service, I do so because I believe in it. I have had a great experience. I feel it is worth it.

Therein lies the difference. Too many today make recommendations for the money, not the personal value. That is why if it even remotely suggested you are not speaking of personal experience, you have no chance of establishing credibility with me. Those marketers pay a high price. They will never get my business again. Worse, I will probably tell others about them.

In the early days of online information, I remember suggesting or promoting anything to be sold on a blog was considered wrong. I never thought that. I thought that was a snobbish attitude. If you have put in the time, the use, and the research, your opinion is valued. And there are situations I would gladly pay for that, particularly if it saves me in time.

Our market has commonly been buyer beware. Or as is. That is another reason why your recommendations are valuable to me.

Let’s face it. I am responsible for my buying decisions. Unless required by law in your industry, you do not owe me a disclaimer nor anyone else. You owe me your integrity. Disclaimers do not make you better, more honest, or superior. Your character does.

Disclaimers are apologies. There’s no reason to apologize. It is not a bad thing if a company offers to offer you a payment for your referral. Especially if the referral is a result of your experience, which often comes as a result of hard work.

Does a disclaimer upset you? I find them pretentious.

I started a Masters program, began exploring the Twitter application, moved from MySpace to Facebook, increasingly became disillusioned (again) with all the hype on the Internet ….

I placed the blog on a low priority, which I think was a mistake. While the pace of change with online modalities is moving at unprecedented speed, the question has recently been proposed that blogging is dead or dying. People want things now and in increments of 140 characters or less, Twitter like.

I hold out that blogs are still relevant and will continue to provide value in a multitude of ways.

I’m coming back. I find the blogging process one that helps slow and lessen the pace and noise found so prevalent in “new” social media. (Odd to hint that blogging is thought of having become passe.)

Twitter and Facebook and maybe Linkedin will still be part of my social marketing, media, and relationship activities. But I’m going to try and hold on to things that allow for reflection and sharing in ways that require more depth.

There’s way too much pretense and shallowness out there.

The coming months are bringing a couple more visits to see friends, passage of the halfway point in my Masters program, structuring of two exciting and challenging business plans, a re-design for the blog, and keeping grounded in the things that matter most.

What do you think?

Here’s the real story. It’s all about the MONEY. Our laws are less and less about protecting citizens and ALL about raising revenue! Enough already! It is my opinion that these fines, penalties, and charges are completely out of control. They are the new taxation disguised as laws written to protect the citizenry. Give me a break.

Today, our managers were alerted by email that law enforcement was moving through the parking areas and issuing tickets on any vehicle that had a frame obstructing the state name. This is a large corporation with multiple parking garages and lots containing thousands of parked vehicles. I do not know how much money was taken in today, but I see this as further evidence that agencies once pledged to serve and protect are now nothing more than collectors for government programs.

More evidence is supported in the fine amounts themselves. Take a look at ANY example where government time, energy, resources, and manpower is dedicated and one will most often find obtrusive penalties. Much of these ordinances, laws, decrees have clearly limited individual liberty and sadly placed burdens on hard-working people.

Heard and read around the web:
This wouldn’t be necessary or an issue if it weren’t for the Department of Transportation trying to make money selling 60 different types of personalized plates covering every social concern (cancer, PETA, etc.) THEY created the problem law enforcement was complaining about

It is not our fault that Arizona has come up with so many different style plates the police can’t tell which state is written across the top

Happy New Year, Arizona.